PLAYER 1 — STILL HERE
No Cryingin the casino.
Ticker: $CASINO · Chain: Ethereum · Table: open
The most luxurious casino on Ethereum. Chandeliers, velvet, gold on everything. And at the centre table, in a pressed tuxedo, one cat having the worst night of his life. Loudly.
House rules
Framed in gold at the entrance. Enforced on everyone except the one cat who needs it most.
House Rules
Posted by management. Ignored by the mascot.
- Rule 1: No crying in the casino.
- Rule 2: See rule 1.
- Rule 3: The house always wins. The cat always cries. Both are permanent.
- Rule 4: $CASINO is a meme token on Ethereum. Zero tax, liquidity locked, supply fixed, tears unlimited.
🧻"I'm fine. This is fine. Deal."WIPING TEARS · PRETENDING EVERYTHING IS FINE
Buy-in
Every player goes through the cashier. Four steps, then you get a seat. Tissues are not provided.
Get your wallet
No wallet, no table.
Install MetaMask or Rabby. Save the seed phrase somewhere dry.
Load ETH
Bring chips to the casino.
Send ETH from any exchange to your wallet. Keep a little extra for gas, the house charges for the lights.
Find the official CA
Don't bet at the wrong table.
Copy the contract address from the big chip below. Every other address is a hustler in a borrowed tux.
Swap
Place the buy-in.
Open Uniswap, paste the CA, set slippage, confirm. Your seat is now warm.
Official table code
The one chip that matters. Tap it to copy. If someone hands you a different chip, they are not the dealer.
High roller room
A private lounge where every bad decision hangs in a gold frame. Click any piece to open the VIP display.
Jackpot ladder
One slot-machine ladder. Five levels. The mascot climbs it as you scroll, crying the whole way up.
First spin
Launch on Ethereum. Website, lore and the big chip go live. First tears hit the felt.
Table open
Community growth. Telegram fills up, X raids begin, the dealer stops asking people to leave.
High roller
More exposure and memes. Sticker packs, clip contests, listings, collabs with other tables.
Jackpot room
Major milestones. Bigger exchange seats, casino-night events, the chandelier gets a second chandelier.
House legend
Infinite meme mode. The cat finally wins a hand. He cries anyway. Rule one is amended to include him.
Place your bet
A slot machine that pays in copium. No real stakes, no real rewards, very real emotional consequences.
Outcomes
| 😭😭😭 | Jackpot | +777 COPIUM |
| 💰💰💰 | House wins again | +0 |
| 💎💎💎 | Diamond paws | +250 |
| 7️⃣7️⃣7️⃣ | Lucky sevens | +150 |
| 🐱🐱🐱 | Full cat | +100 |
| 🍒🍒🍒 | Cherries | +50 |
| 😭😭 | Tears multiplied | +20 |
| Anything else | You won nothing | +0 |
Copium is a made-up number. It cannot be withdrawn, traded or cried into. Press space to spin while the machine is in view.
The wheel decides
Can't choose where to go next? Neither could he. Spin the wheel and let the house pick your next room.
VIP Members Only
Black leather, gold light, a champagne bucket nobody ordered. This is the only room where the mascot is, somehow, completely calm.
COMPOSED (TEMPORARY)Observed in the VIP lounge at 02:40. Did not cry for eleven whole minutes. Staff were concerned.
Live table
The main betting table. Real numbers come from Dexscreener. The joke meters on the side come from the cat.
The live Dexscreener chart appears on this table the moment the contract address is set.
Open on DexscreenerDecorative meters
The dealer reads these out loud every hour. Nobody has asked him to.